To be accepted by someone in a relationship, we must accept ourselves first. Those, who are able to embark on this journey of introspection, tend to have healthy relationships

Introspection does not come easy to any of us. The fact is that adulting often makes us lose touch with our own selves. Very few consciously take stock of how the environment around us influences and changes us. In my sessions, 95% of my clients are unable to list five qualities they like and dislike about themselves; or, why they react to certain situations the way they do. Will a single person, in this state of mind, be able to make the right choice of a partner?

What is it that keeps us from knowing ourselves? What is it that we are scared of? Perhaps, it’s the fear of what we might find, and whether we will be able to accept and fix it. What’s important to know is that to be accepted by someone, we must accept ourselves first. Those who are able to do that, lead their lives with a certain confidence, especially where relationships are concerned.
For forty-year-old T, a Delhi-based entrepreneur, the journey of self-discovery is different from R’s. For the last four years, she has been in a situationship with M, with who she is madly in love. M.R. spends all his free time with her, advises T on all aspects of her life—profession, finance, which car to buy etc. They have great sex. But even after all that, M denies that he is in a relationship with T He calls her a good friend and says he is very sure that he will not be in a relationship with her. In these four years, T has tried to distance herself twice from him. But each time there is some medical emergency—either with M or his family—T goes running back to him. She has realised over time that intimation of medical emergencies, even in her inner circle, sends her in a tizzy and she feels responsible for the person.
Source - mint